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Vandy Reaction: depressive

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We tried to make you feel better about the loss to Vandy. But that’s not the whole picture.

Kansas State v Vanderbilt Photo by Frederick Breedon/Getty Images

(Continued from before)

Shut up. Just shut your mouth. You realize the damage you’re doing?

Optimism is fine, in moderation. In excess, it’s an opiate. We don’t need any more of those addicts these days.

Losing to the worst program in the SEC’s history? C’mon. Vandy is headed in the right direction. But they’re just starting that journey. This is a team that lost to by-god Kentucky and by-god Missouri last year and finished next-to-last in the godforsaken SEC East. They finished 3-5 in conference and didn’t even play Alabama or LSU. Or Texas A&M, Arkansas or Mississippi State, for that matter.

We gotta reassess, pardner. We thought the days of the Stanford Shamblesaster and the Moonshine Incident in Morgantown were past us. The past isn’t gone. Hell, it isn’t even past. Remember Ertz’s line from Morgantown last year? Remember the drops? We replicated all of that.

Coaches got in on the game, too. Started alright with the plan to get an extra blocker by running the quarterback. But that’s a constraint, not a strategy. You use it to set up something else, otherwise you bust your quarterback’s shoulder and his head by week six. And the something else you’re setting up isn’t downfield passing off straight drops. Didn’t fool anybody and played right into the hands of a well-prepared secondary.

Look, it’s not all your fault. We all passed around the illicit stuff in the offseason. Got a little high off finishing last year 6-1. Someone needed to step up and point out that Baylor and TCU were already dead by the time we stumbled over ‘em, that Texas lost to Kansas*, Iowa State was still Coach-So-Proud’s players, that Kansas is the new Futility U, and that Texas A&M goes MIA after September. Hell, they had the top pick in the NFL Draft and were still barely a top 40 defense. Against SEC offenses. Pokes were the only competent outfit of the bunch, and we couldn’t even hold a two-score lead in the fourth quarter at home against them.

*People forget that, but they did.

Better get your expectations in check, pard. If disappointment is the difference between expectation and result, then you’re setting yourself up for a fall into Marianna’s Trench. Now, get up.

(The manic narrator from before struggles to his feet, dazed. When he sees the speaker’s face, his cloudy eyes bulge)

Yep, I’m you. But the clear-eyed realist version. Enough lecturing. Let’s go kick some dead bears.