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Hello, in case you didn’t notice already… I have a real name now! Not only does this exciting change make me qualified to give you all the EXPANSIONPALOOZA takes, it makes me even more of a professional. Now that I am no longer hiding behind my anonymous handle of "SprotsGAT" we can get down to business. The issue at hand today? Clemson joining the Big 12 in efforts to save our dismal conference and get us back on track to greatness.
Earlier, Jon sat down with @Brian_Goodison of Shakin' the Southland to chit chat about all things Clemson being part of the Big 12 expansion rumblings.
Wait, they don’t want to join the Big 12?
From what I have read, Clemson had no interest in joining our conference before and has no interest in joining now either. Well this certainly makes it hard for me to have a case against them when they already agree with me. But playing pretend isn’t just for toddlers anymore. Let’s pretend they really wanted in and we were playing hard to get. Big 12 could use a team that won in the College Football Playoff system. Maybe they could whisper sweet nothings in our ear about how they won and beat the... oh wait, they didn’t win against Alabama. They did, however, clobber Oklahoma in the Orange Bowl, so they have a better track record in the CFB Playoff. We don't need those that don't need us, so boo you guys.
They have inferior BBQ
This is not an argument, so @ someone else. Kansas City BBQ reigns supreme in the Big 12, Oklahoma and Texas stay inferior and South Carolina BBQ would only give Texas BBQ a leg up in the Big 12 BBQ rankings.
Oh good, another middle of nowhere school!
Seriously guys, can we find one school for me to argue about that doesn’t require a thousand mile trip for Kansas State? Clemson is another trek for fans to journey to and I’m tired just thinking about that trip. Once again, simple teleporting needs to exist before we add schools that are 1,000+ miles away. Until this breakthrough in science happens, we should stick with the rule that applies to everyone except West Virginia (Bob Huggins doesn’t have to pay attention to rules, sorry) to make it easy. The rule? Must be able to travel by covered wagon in case of apocalypse and no modern transportation is available.
The ACC is a better fit for them
The Big 12 requires you to be competitive at all sports, not just one. Well, unless you are Kansas. Clemson has titles in football and baseball, some runner up trophy in men’s communist kickball and of course the runner up trophy for the CFB Playoff. Basketball is something the Big 12 thrives on, with the ACC being direct competition for best overall conference year after year. Take away a lackluster basketball team from the ACC and add it to the Big 12 you say? Well, they made the NIT Semifinals recently and finished seventh in the conference last year which is better than Kansas State has done. Clemson would simply be another school Bruce Weber would be embarrassed by and I think we should try to protect his feelings as much as possible and get a school that cannot play basketball at all. Sorry Clemson, you’re doing too well to join us if we make it a selfish basketball thing revolving around our head coach’s feelings.
We already have TWO orange teams and one is enough
Let’s face it, no one looks good in orange. There will always be a better color for you to wear and you have to be careful about your spray tan when your team’s color is orange. I wouldn’t know, the colors of my teams are regal and majestic and blend perfectly with my spray tans. The orange takeover would be too much and that alone is reason to keep Clemson in the ACC and out of our conference.
Agree? Disagree? Want to fight me about BBQ or how great you look in orange? @SprotsGAT