Tonight, people who know very little about anything will be blathering at you via the wonder of televisual communication about the first batch of players forced to accept assignment to one of 32 professional franchises.
Or, in simpler terms, "Berman babbling buffoonishly 'bout 'ball".
But let's face it, you're either going to be watching it on television, following on a website, or monitoring via Twitter or other social media. Because you, dear reader, are a junkie. Plain and simple.
If you'd like some more entertaining commentary, we encourage you to check out SB Nation's own live draft show hosted by Dan Rubenstein and Matt Ufford. There will be a 30-minute pre-draft show at 6:30 CT, and a wrap-up at 10pm CT. And it's right here:
While you're doing nothing else more productive, you can also read this piece from Ezra Klein at our sister site Vox.com about NFL teams ignoring simple analysis and picking the wrong players.
Other than that, my friends, this is your open thread for the first round, in which we will absolutely not see any Wildcats selected. We will, however, see the Chiefs screw up yet again. Or maybe not. Please, Jeebus, let it be the latter.