As some of you know, I travel a lot for work. I've flown all over this great land of ours, and I've spent more hours in a plane than I'd like to admit. That said, it means I spend a lot of time reading paperback books, listening to my iPod, and chatting with people in the seat next to me.
However, sometimes, I'm not in the mood to read or chat. I just turn on my iPod, stare out the window, and I let my mind wander. I did just that last night as I flew home, and I figured that I'd jot down a few things that crossed my mind.
For those of you who read this and think I'm crazy, I'm aware of that already, so there's no need to point that out to me.
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Whenever I see Bo Pelini on the sidelines, I always think, "There's a guy that looks like he's headed to Dick's Sporting Goods to buy an elliptical machine. And, like everything at Dick's, he'll pay too much for it. But that won't be what upsets him. Ultimately he'll be dissatisfied after he finds out that he can't play his Zune in the built-in iPod docking station."
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Would it surprise you if Mike Leach decided to coach a game wearing a Chewbacca mask? Not me.
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I had no idea Zac Robinson was on Gossip Girl. ZOMGLOLZ!!?!
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Memo to John Currie: You know how to make a lot of money really quickly? Have Bill Snyder and the assistant coaching staff sing Journey songs during halftime. Insist they bring it home with "Lovin', Touchin', Squeezin'".
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Why is there Tracy Bonham on my iPod? Who is Tracy Bonham? Is she the woman that sang 'Fast Car'? No, that was Tracy Chapman. That was a good song. I'll have to Wiki Tracy Bonham when I get home because I have no idea who this is. That will teach me to stop buying those mix CD's at Target.
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Mark Mangino is the only man who makes wrap around shades look uncomfortable.
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Gary Pinkel is an avid motorcyclist. Sometimes, I think he rides his motorcycle to some random, small Missouri town, and he goes to the local watering hole. While there, he gets really drunk, and he gets into it with one of the locals. As soon as they get ready to brawl, Pinkel takes off his shirt, and on his back is a giant flaming eagle tattoo. The eagle's talons clasp a banner inscribed with the phrase, "...and this bird you cannot change". The townie sees the tattoo, tells Gary that "Freebird" is his favorite song, and they have a beer together and ultimately realize that all differences can be solved by listening to Lynyrd Skynyrd.
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Memo to all new coaches: Do you want to know how to win fans over immediately? Say that you're implementing a spread offense. Want to score bonus points? Use phrases like 'wide splits' and 'no huddle offense'.
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Dan Hawkins has the worst haircut of all of the Big 12 coaches. Hands down. Everytime I see him, I think of H.R. Pufnstuf. Come to think of it, I think his mind just loops old Sid and Marty Kroft shows, which explains A LOT.
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I've never understood why Oklahoma would essentially glorify land grabbers.
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Why is it that whenever the pilot says that they found smooth air and turn off the fasten seatbelt signs, the flight gets bumpy almost immediately after that?
"One of these days, the Dread Pirate Leach will show them all!"
HR Puffnstuff (via muttonpies)